Our fallen soldiers

One week, two friends lost, hundreds hurting…

As today passes, two of our friends have been laid to rest in the past seven days, and they’ve been some of the worst days I’ve ever experienced in my life.

They say you go through stages; I know I have. I was at my cottage when I heard the news and I was in denial. I couldn’t believe that something so terrible could have happened to two people with the purest of hearts, who genuinely thought the best of everyone and faced the world honestly, proudly and without pretence.

Then, as I got to thinking, I got angry. Why were they driving so fast? Why would they put three people in a two-seater car? What did they do wrong? Why did they suffer? Why did it have to happen to them, of all people?

It wasn’t until I returned to Toronto two days later did it start to sink in. I saw all of my elementary, high school and work friends gathering to pay respects to Geetesh at his viewing.

My anger quickly turned to sadness. I’ve had trouble sleeping; I can’t get them out of my head. When I finally do fall asleep, I see them in my dreams, thinking about their last moments and the pain they felt and it hurts me more than words can explain. I take comfort in knowing they were taken because God needed their help, because their time on earth had come to an end, but I will never, ever understand.

To Gee and Adam: Thank you so much for being the amazing men you were. Despite being taken far too soon, you gave us years of laughter and love. You were many different things; you were courageous, you were funny, you were intelligent, you were immensely talented. But most of all, the both of you were great company and as good and true of a friend as anyone could ever ask for.

Gee, I miss you like crazy. I can’t stop thinking about all of the hilarious times we’ve had in middle school, high school and even at Future Shop. I will never forget those days and I’ll cherish the memories always. Being at your house, seeing the outpour of love from your friends and family, it just broke my heart that you couldn’t be there with us. You were a great friend, I will love and miss you forever.

Adam, I was at your house the other day, as I have been the past few days, and in listening to stories about you, and just sitting in your room and seeing what you were about, I am so sorry we didn’t get a chance to hang out after high school. I will regret that for the rest of my life. Next time I see you, we’re finally going to get that chance. All of us are there for your family, as you know, we’ve been there for hours on end. You will forever live on in all of us… your smile has been etched in my mind. Don’t ever stop smiling and enjoy your hungry man dinners and Gatorade in the sky, love you.

We decorated Kiefer’s truck with Trini flags, guys. You would have loved it and been so proud. (Especially of all the white folks showing pride!) We took a great picture with all of us surrounding it and gave it to your parents. Every time we see these photos we will think of how great you guys were and how much it sucks that you’re not with us. You have impacted our lives so much and we will miss you until we meet again.

To Roma & Charles, Annie & Shri: You raised two of the most respectful, and amazing men I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. They were one of a kind, which is odd, because they were so alike, such free spirits. Both of your boys lived their lives to the fullest, with each day filled with love and laughs. Every single person who had the pleasure of spending even one minute with Gee or Adam are better people because of them today.

For all my friends who are hurting, the families who’ve been affected by this and anyone who is reading right now, I want you to remember one thing: The time you spent with your friend, brother, son or nephew is never lost because it forever lives on inside of you.

So, to end… in the words of Rupee: “Please remember those who left us when you take your wine, cause it could have been you who didn’t make it through, please bear that in mind. And those who have gone, your soul still lives on in the band show and fete and for the contribution you made to the earth, we will never forget.”

I hope everyone finds a way to keep in contact with each other to ensure the next time we all come together will not be because another one of our friends have passed. Take a minute out of your day to say hello to someone you miss speaking with. Send a quick note to anyone you’re close to at least once a week. Do anything you can to not lose touch, because if you do, you may never see them again. I have so much more I could say, but I’d be writing for days. I’ll never stop thinking about you guys, I’m sure you will cross my mind at least once each day and I know this won’t be the last time I write to you.

Rest in peace Geetesh and Adam, you will be missed forever and never forgotten. Save a place for us up there and don’t have too much fun without us. It’s not goodbye, we’ll see you later.

A short poem in memory of Geetesh Singh and Adam Bhagiratti

We sit around and wonder as the days go by,

All we have is pictures… why did you have to die?

It’s time to let you go; your spirits now are free,

But you’ll never really be gone; you’ll live inside of us.

So though we had to leave you at your resting place,

We will always remember your smiling, beautiful face.

This is not a goodbye; we will not weep anymore,

You’re in a better place than you ever were before.

Even though we will miss you and think about you every day,

You’ll never leave our hearts; your love is here to stay.

RIP Geetesh Singh

As you’ve read, myself and many friends lost to men dear to us in a tragic car accident on the night of July 6, and we miss them dearly.

And despite the terrible circumstances, you guys will finally be treated to a piece written by someone other than myself:

We live in a world today, where tomorrow can never come
Where we could go to sleep tonight, not knowing it’s our last one
A world that’s so corrupt, that god knows it’s not meant for us
And so he takes us all to a better place, starting with the best of us.
Geetesh, was an amazing person, filled with life’s greatest attributes
Personable, Smart, talented and a “live life to the fullest” attitude
He’s the life at every party, someone who could always make you smile
Always made you feel like a night out with him was more than worthwhile
Geetesh has touched us all, as a friend, as a brother, and as even more
The way he made us always smile, we will always adore
The way he made problems in life disappear, we will never forget
And the chances I’ve blown to spend time with him, I will always regret
Though he may not be with us now, the memories he’s given us will always remain
And one day, god knows that in another place, we will all meet again,
And until that day, we must remember that Geetesh never really left anywhere
He’ll always live on through the memories, inside of us, everywhere
Through every picture on facebook to every cell phone video
To every silly little thing he used to do that we can’t stop thinking of
To all the times he’s picked us up and made our lives feel at ease
Geetesh – we’ll miss you dearly, may your soul rest in peace,
And to his family, auntie and uncle, my deepest condolences
And please know that a part of Geetesh will always live on inside of all of us.

Sincerely,
Karthik Mattaparthy.

Gone, but never, ever forgotten

I’ve sat down a few times today trying to put together some words in memory of two of the most kindhearted people I know, but it was a struggle and still is…

Two completely different men, one horrifically tragic end: on July 6, the world lost two incredible individuals.

Those two who once made us all ‘bust a gut’ laughing now have us hunched over in tears; that’s not how they would want to see us. Instead of mourning their deaths, we should be remembering their existence and the greatness they brought to our lives.

Easier said than done, right? Whenever someone passes away, especially at such a young age or so suddenly, this is what we’re told. I suppose those people have not yet been affected in such a way, because there is no one way to grieve. Some grieve by remembering the good, some by mourning for a period of time; either way, there is no wrong way.

I personally will remember all of the fun times I had with Gee the, unfortunately very few, with Adam. While I am sad, if I wallow, it will only make it harder for myself.

Geetesh, you were easily one of the most kindhearted, caring and funny guys I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. I heard the news this morning as I was just waking up and I thought it was a terrible dream I’d be able to wake up from… it wasn’t. I’ll never forget our talks about school, work problems and our futures. I most definitely will not forget my totally lame (but awesome at the time, we thought) birthday parties and sending you home with half a pizza because no one else ate the vegetarian, or always eating your tangerines at lunch time in Clairlea (and totally baiting you out to your mom about it, too!) But most of all, I will never forget that big, beautiful smile of yours. There are just so many great things… I would have to sit here for hours, typing until my fingers hurt, to be able to list them all. I hope you are watching down on all of us who love you with a great big smile, with some soca blaring in your ears, Gee. I love you, I’ll miss you, but I will never forget you.

Adam, we never really got a chance to get to know each other all that well, but you were a part of a crowd that included a bunch of amazing guys, and you were clearly no short of amazing yourself. The times we really got to talk were when I shared the locker with Mark and we’d stop by each other in the hallways and I’d always be laughing; you were such a joker. I really regret not getting to know you better because, with the outpour of love from so many people, you obviously grew to be a great guy. I hope you and Gee are having a good time up there and save a vodka-seven for me. It’s a shame the world will be void of your big, beautiful smile and your bright eyes. Look over those who love you, they will need you more than ever now. You’re gone, but never forgotten. xo.

Rest in peace.

Geetesh Singh: September 23, 1988 – July 6, 2009

Adam Bhagiratti: January 6, 1988 – July 6, 2009